Comparisons are (not always)..... odious!

The other day, I was in the cabin of a bank manager, to get some work done. A man (whom I have seen occasionally) in my neighborhood, walked in briskly and had a few minutes chat with the manager. Then he went to a counter and attended to his business. He looked my age (or may be slightly younger....!). The bank manager then surprised me by saying that 'he is a lawyer and practicing still'. I asked 'what of it?' He then told me that 'he is 85 years old....'! I was really taken by surprise. I used to pride myself for being able to move around normally at this age(?).... (let us keep it a secret for now, okay). Compared to the lawyer's agility, I am nothing. I was left with no alternative but to compare with that young(!) man..... At that point, I decided to indulge in regular walking and some physical exertion.  Here the comparison actually helped me to better myself.

'See the marks scored by Mohan, our neighbor's son. He is also studying in your school and in the same class as you. Then why are you not able to score like him?' This is a standard dialogue heard in most of the households. Then you curse yourself for being Mohan's neighbor, right? Most of the parents have this complex. They do not realize that each one is different. Their talents are different. What the parents have to do is help in identifying the special talent your child possesses and nurture that into a special skill. Such disgraceful comparisons will make your ward to detest you and punish you with a vengeance. This happens in most of the cases.

We generally tend to compare the superficial things like 'tone of the skin', 'the look' etc., while choosing our life partner. We concentrate on such frivolous outwardly attributes rather than the real interior beauty of the other half! The core attributes are always neglected. They never look for the compatibility seen from various angles. This is one of the main reasons most of the marriages fail so quickly (when the initial attraction wanes). So it is futile to compare such meaningless attributes among the brides or grooms-to-be, and take a fateful decision. Whether it is an arranged marriage or love marriage, this is very important.

There is a funny story. (This is only a story...). A magician appeared in front of a man and told him to ask for a boon. The magician told the person that he will give 'twice the same boon' to his neighbor. This man first  wanted to test the magician's boon - giving ability. He asked for a car. he got it! After some time he realized that his neighbor got 2 cars!! He was not satisfied with what he got. He called the magician again and said that he had another request. He asked for one of his eyes to be damaged.  You know what happened to his neighbor!

I have heard this in a discourse by a scholar. When you have to compare yourself to another person regarding your habits, you have to compare with that of a noble person (not a scoundrel). Only then you can improve yourself by emulating the noble's habits. When you have to compare yourself monetarily, you have to compare yourself with that of a person poorer than you. Then only you will be satisfied that God had given you enough. If you have to compare you with a richer person, then you have to positively take it and get richer by good deeds.

Please do not compare yourself with others and degrade you. It is not fair to you.


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